

You’re assuming a lot from a few paragraphs, and in a way proving their point. The assumption that some autistic people are pleasant so it must be possible for many is just plain wrong. There are autistic people that can’t speak or that constantly scream and being around them is difficult with personality being meaningless in any interactions with them.
Your description of authenticity and its importance to you is a societal expectation. The request of talking more from others is a societal expectation. The fact that you’re struggling in a system where you’re viewed as outside the norm is societal expectation.
People in general expect the world and the people they interact with to be like them more or less. Your coworkers do it to you and if frustrates you, but you’re doing it to them which frustrates them. You expect authenticity because you’re attempting authenticity and they’re expecting societal norms and are presenting societal norms.
You aren’t required to participate in their system, but it won’t be easy on you.
I do want to touch on something you said about societal expectations. You say they’re a form of unconscious, self imposed control. How is your authenticity any different? Autism makes it hard to think outside a tried and true path. That rigidity is difficult to deal with, but may be worth looking into. Regardless, being authentic will be difficult in most social spaces, but that isn’t an absolute. The onus is on both you and the people around you.