cow!

I get a little triggered by unsolicited advice as I’m a survivor of narcissistic abuse and, for me personally, it was weaponized as a means of control, destructive criticism, manipulation etc. In general, I tend to take it as a sign that whoever is giving it isn’t a good fit for me in a friendship/relationship paradigm. In personal relationships, I find it is almost always intrusive, disrespectful, and/or harmful to the relational bond.

However, a professional context can be different. Unsolicited advice from a manager could be an attempt at coaching/mentoring and I would give it consideration. If it’s coming from a coworker in my field with more experience than me, who I also respect, same response as above. A coworker in an unrelated department who I don’t respect? Ignore advice and make an internal note that they are likely not my kind of people.

Feeling blessed that this is basically my life, except I do have to go to pesky work Mon-Fri. And work is work, I’d always rather be home, but in the grand scheme of jobs, I have one where I’m challenged and get to learn new things with a decent group of humans on my team and good work/life balance so, yeah, feeling blessed for sure.

Just last month, I left work early on a Thursday, met my now husband at the local courthouse, and we got married! Cost about $50 bucks. We’re happy as clams about it, our families wanted us to do more but, that sounds like a them problem honestly lol

I do feel differently. Not more committed, I’ve long been ride or die with this human, but I get this sweet, sudden uprush of cozy emotions when I say, “my husband”, or when he calls me “wife”. I love him a lot and it makes me simultaneously very proud and very humble to declare that publicly.

A suspicion of cats lol